“I Suffered In My Marriage, Had A Miscarriage” – Actress Chika Ike Opens Up

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Nollywood Actress, Chika Ike whose divorce is finally concluded pens an open letter to her fans, opening up about the physical abuse she suffered at the hands of the man she called her husband for five years.
“The past three years has been a very emotional
period for me. I focused my energy on work and to
build back my self esteem. its been really hard for
me to come out straight and talk about this because
sometimes I pinch myself to wake up and not
believe that I was a victim of domestic violence.
I’ve been through a lot in my life, faced a lot of
challenges but this is one topic I’ve tried so hard to
avoid and have been waiting for the right time but I
have come to a resolve that there’s really no right
time because every second of the day,lives are
being lost due to domestic violence. I was a victiim
of domestic violence in my marriage and that was
the singular reason I left my marriage, aside other
reasons.
Growing up as a girl. I was always known as the
sweetest kid on the block, before I got married, I
have been through some relationships and for once
no man had ever laid a finger on me. The first time
it happened in my marriage I didn’t understand it
because I am not the type of woman a man beats
but I guess there are no types. It just happens and
no woman deserves it. As a young girl I thought it
was love or his way of expressing his emotions,after
every beating he pleads , cries and says it won’t
happen again, once again I thought it was love and
made excuses for him.
Over the years when it kept happening consistently I
started looking for other definitions for it. I started
loosing my self pride,self esteem , self worth, and
most painfully I lost a pregnancy (Miscarriage) I
almost lost my life in the process then I realised
how serious and abnormal it really was.
I have heard and read a lot of accusations from
ignorant people who don’t know my story,I guess
that’s why they are ignorant. I was 20yrs old and
very naïve to the world when I got married .” They
said I married for money” LOL. I was married to a
corporate guy, who had a 9-5 job in a bank, Lives in
a rented 2 bedroom apartment at Egbe.. So do the
maths! . I married for love. I did a traditional
wedding. A white wedding and a court wedding.
So that’s how much I wanted to be married forever.
For five years I hoped, prayed & wished that one day
it will all change. But the last straw that broke the
carmels back was during a heated argument he
threw a glass jug to my face and I dogged it and it
shattered on d wall. I saw death flash before me and
I made a decision to save my life. I left my
marriage.
Am not saying this to draw pity from anyone
because we are entitled to our opinions and
believes. I am not also saying this to discourage
people from falling in love because its a beautiful
feeling and I still believe in it. I am saying this to
educate, share and talk about my experience as a
victim of domestic violence because it is real”. Marital Violence though common in Nigeria, goes against every religious belief system (Islam, Christianity Traditionalism) and moral standing; hence I continue to wonder on what basis one person abuses another…..ijs.

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